Back from hiatus(?)

I see that it's has been a long time since I wrote a post. Getting all existential about your life and then moving to a different continent will do that to you. I also started (and have been neglecting) a different blog and wrote a few stories in the hiatus. So it's not all bad on the creative writing front.

Its so quiet as I sit in my room now and watch a leafy slowly flutter down from the tree in my backyard. The grey silence of autumn is strangely soporific. It is peaceful and unnerving at the same time - I crave the quiet and the solitude but it often plunges me into a kind of pessimistic lethargy. And so, I try daily to strike that right balance between a public life and a private one.

When one is alone, it is so easy to carve out some me-time. To do just what pleases one or to do nothing at all if that is what one chooses. It can quite spoil you for company. So easy to lay curled up in bed, endless thoughts spinning through one's head.

Being alone makes you realize just how many conversations you have with yourself. And if you're like me, it doesn't bother you at all because you have a pretty active inner voice anyways. It struck me one day as I was going back home after a long day at the office. Once my office work is done, it is highly likely that I speak to no one at all as I journey back home, prepare dinner and get ready for bed.

You realize that the reason why you didn't do certain things has nothing to do with location and everything to do with you. I thought I would finally learn the culinary arts once I was on my own. Turns out I still don't like to cook. Neither the beautiful kitchen nor the growling of my tummy can make me do it. I do the occasional egg-frying, pasta making etc. but I find I can't be bothered to do more when I can do less. In other words, when I can easily eat out or buy ready to eat food which fits my mood at the time, why would I want to spend time cooking. After a hard day at work or even over precious weekends, I feel I'd rather spend my time doing something else.

This is not to say that I don't miss home-cooked food. I miss it intensely. The cliche about nothing quite besting "ma ke haath ka khana" (meals cooked by mother) is true my friends. After a while, all the restaurants of the world will pale in comparison to a meal of familiar, comfort food cooked by your mom. But yes, the fact that I am used to dining out and experimenting with my cuisine has been helpful. I know some people who stuck to the same culinary diet all their lives and suffered each time they had to travel. Experimenting with one's taste buds is one of the joys of living.

This also means of course that plans of a change in lifestyle have flown out of the window. Healthy, organic food, regular exercise and other such dreams turn to dust when I get stressed with work. Then only a ready to eat cheese-laden pizza and several precious hours of sleep seem important. Waking up early to exercise? You must be joking. Working out after work? Do you know what time my work gets over? So, yeah.

I get easily distracted these days, so I'll assume the same for you and continue my knowledge-sharing some other time. I have to go figure out what to have for lunch.

Uttar Dakshin Purab Paschim

Well there's this major blog battle going on because a South Indian girl wrote some vitriolic stuff about Delhi boys here. The Madrasan, as she calls herself, has been lauded but has also been at the receiving end of major Delhiite outrage.

For my part, I think the girl is sharp but immature. Her post crossed the fine line between being humorously sarcastic and being genuinely nasty. And because generalisations are always crap. Just because she met an obnoxious Delhiite or two (or more) doesn't really mean that she can lambast the whole breed. Also I think that in this time and age, people would be more broadminded and judge (if they must) based on individuals not on communities or skin colour or gender.
Most reactionary posts that I read were not half as biting or offensive as hers was. Here's one which I particularly liked. Funny, witty and makes some good points. My only concession to the Madrasan would be that she has the 'right to write' what she wants to on her blog.

But her post shows that most people are still quite happy to play 'us vs. them' games. I guess its human nature to want divides. Being different is not always cool, sometimes its almost a crime. What else would explain all the communalism and regionalism that we still see these days. People want separate states (as if India didn't already have enough of them), people want to rename states to bring it closer to the regional name (a dumb idea if ever there was one!)...

I am a South Indian born and brought up in the Eastern part of the country and I speak fluent Bangla. Most people commend me for it and express their astonishment. By now, I have explained to several hundred Bengalis that the reason behind this is because I have been born and brought up in the East, because I have several close friends who are Bengali. Most don't seem quite convinced. In their eyes I'm still something of a rare bird. The other day a woman commented that "you people come from outside and learn to speak our language so well, I don't think I could do the same." I forebore to tell her that in today's age, when we have the freedom to travel and settle in any part of the world, to talk about 'coming from outside' is a moot point. I realised that telling her that my family had been settled in the East for a few generations had not made a difference to her. So I let her enjoy her blistering parochialism (or candour depending on which view you take). After all it takes all kinds.

I think its okay to be attached to a place, its historic grandeur, its warm people, its cute foibles and its appalling laziness. Its a bit like how one feels about friends - the funny one, the caring one, the full on masti one. One doesn't discriminate between friends basis community, religion or skin colour. I listen to generalizations but I react to individuals.
But sometimes I do feel that I am expected to align myself to a particular way of thinking and being. As if tying me down would give me more freedom. I resent this. I intend to set up a Non Aligned Movement of my own. And so I won't get into any discussion of Delhi boys and Southie gals...just tell me when you meet a nice PERSON.

New beginnings

Nothing is constant except change.

I am currently trying to get myself in a frame of mind where I am able to learn new things, about a new business. Have changed jobs after 6 years. Trying to gear up for whatever challenges may lie ahead. Strangely while everyone else seems to be view it as an occasion for going into raptures, I am a little more circumspect. The way I see it, I just gave up the comfort and security of a place where 'everybody knows your name' and am now about to dive into uncharted waters. It is exciting of course, challenging for sure. That is why I did it - I was tired of being complacent, of doing the same things everyday. But if you are a worrier like me, you will understand how I feel. And I have had a pretty bad experience with my first job itself. It was a campus placement into a reputed bank. Now I am amazed at how vulnerable and naive I was then. We all were. Out of 13 recruits, only 4 were left in the bank at the end of a year. So anyways, I am still somewhat troubled by the thought of the 4 months (yep!) that I spent in the bank. My benchmark is now 4 months. Fingers crossed.

My time in between jobs was spent in visiting relatives and friends. I hadn't seen this branch of my family for almost 8 years. It was such a thrill reconnecting with all of them. My cousins who I remembered as babies were now ready to give their board exams. The time I spent playing games with them was one of the highlights of my trip. I think its great to have children in the house. They keep you young. With their unbridled enthusiasm for life and their innocence.

Our ancestral home is near a village so I reconnected with a simpler way of living also. At one point, there was actually no network reception on my cellphone. But the doors of the house were thrown wide open and people kept streaming in the whole day. Somebody's uncle, brother, aunt, neighbour - they all dropped in to say hello and be introduced to me. It makes one wonder about the islands that we have become with our city bred ways. The whole area was surrounded by rubber plantations and my dad showed me the various plants and trees where he had played as a child. the food that we ate was plucked from the trees on the property. Nature at its purest. I remember standing near the front door putting my hand out to feel the rain splash on it while the trees whispered a melody all around me. Cool, fresh, green.

I went to stay with some friends after this in Bangalore. It was a short trip but one of the best I've had so far. We managed to pack in loads of adda sessions, lazing, shopping, sightseeing and of course, partying. The best memory would have to be when we were on this rooftop open air lounge called 13th Floor. The lights of UB city looming large amid the surrounding darkness, the cool breeze ready to whisk you away, the heady music, the soft chatter of the crowds and the company of good friends. Some moments are enough to last you for a long while.

We were having this discussion one day about what our vocation is, what is it that we want to 'do' in life. People who know what they are passionate about, what they want to become, are lucky - musicians, designers, even doctors or teachers. I think my calling in life possibly is to just chill with friends! That's the only thing I seem to be passionate about doing. And reading. Or rather having books to read. I returned home with 10 books after a 6 day trip.

And so, I sit here thinking about how soon time flies. I was just a fresher the other day and now I am a veteran, I was just the youngest in my family and now am an aunt, there I was waiting to vote when I turned 18 and here I am into my third decade. So cheers to new beginnings - the only way to live!

Hence proved!

Theorem:

Nothing succeeds like excess... ~says Nigella Lawson

Proof:

Given below

Old-fashioned Chocolate cake

Ginger Glazed ham

Cheesecakelets

Hungarian sandwich

Photos courtesy: foodnetwork.com

Loves Likes Hates Adores

It’s that time of the year again. When love turns tangible. It floats around you in the form of heart shaped balloons. All that glitters in the jewellery advertisements is not gold but love. Red is the ‘in’ colour. From top restaurants to luxury spas, everyone just wants you and your beloved to have a romantic day. Really, that’s all they want. Oh and your wallet besides. Yes, its Valentines’ Day – celebrated by lovebirds and marketers all over the world. After all Shakespeare himself gives his nod saying, "They do not love that do not show their love". Oh well, a complicated emotion like Love needs at least its own day if not a decade dedicated to it.



FB has it right – there’s so much to ‘like’ in life really. Few things can compare with the joy of reading an engrossing book by a much loved author while letting the balmy weather wash over you. As Winter raises its hat in a final farewell, it imbues the air with a mellowness - neither too cold nor too warm. This is the time to warm one’s toes in the sun. To drowse in the daytime and dream in myriad colours. To catch up on good cinema, go for an open air concert or party. It’s time for a much awaited break.



And recently I read about World War I and the Russian revolution, saw a movie about the Gulf war and one fine day I found that an actual revolution was taking place in Tunisia and Egypt. It set me thinking about why human beings thrive on oppression and hatred. Hate is a strong word. To be used sparingly and with caution. If only people could ‘live and let live’ so many lives would be spared, so much pain minimized. Hatred begets hatred. But we never seem to learn unless there is a major upheaval. Maybe hate is genetically programmed into us, like love. Time to evolve.



The next generation will maybe find the way out. Right now they are bunch of adorable babies with wide-eyed curious stares. Many of my friends have had babies this year and I have been bowled over by each of the little munchkins. There is nothing like cuddling a small baby to bring out all one’s protective instincts. As I looked at each one’s face, all chubby cheeks and tendrils of soft hair that emanates a typical ‘baby’ smell (or maybe it’s just Johnson & Johnsons) I wondered what they would grow up to be. I pray that somehow they manage to retain a bit of the innocence they now have even when they move into adulthood. Choose a-little-Innocence over all-out-Cynicism any day.


P.S. The title of this post refers to a game that we used to play as kids.

La Dolce far Niente...

...that's Italian for the "the sweetness of doing nothing". And boy, do they have that right! I am beginning to feel some of these European countries really have their priorities sorted out. I mean, the Italians have a phrase like this which pretty much advocates laziness, the Spaniards have their 'siesta' or afternoon nap - another beautiful concept. After yet another hard week's work, I feel sweet idleness is the true road to nirvana.

I mean, seriously, why is doing nothing so bad? Is it because the work ethic is so deeply instilled in us that to do nothing is seen as defeatist? Why do we push ourselves so much, constantly striving to reach who knows what - more money, a bigger house, a better car. And we slot our pockets of relaxation - one Sunday a week, one week off every six months or so. And even then there's this pressure to "do" something, "go" somewhere.

The more I think about all this, the more I find myself wondering what is the point of all this rush - waking up in the morning as soon as possible, rushing through breakfast, spending 11 stressful hours at work running between meetings, briefings, mails, desperately trying to finish a piece of work in the vain hope that it will give you some time to breathe, hurrying back home because its late, rushing through dinner and then trying to squeeze in some quality time with family before collapsing into dreamless sleep. Then there are vacations which have to be planned, social networking to be conducted, keeping oneself up-to-date with the latest news and views. And we do this day after day. No wonder we often wonder where the day, the week, the year disappeared.

Why this tearing hurry which leads nowhere, like running on a treadmill of activity? All we are doing really is sprinting through life, just hurtling towards the eternal end. What we really need, what I really need is to just Stop and Take a deep breath. Spread my time for "Niente" through the day rather than just once a year. Cut down on all the fevered activity and consequently cut down on a lot of stress. It is time to take control of our lives, to realize that the present is what we need to enjoy. The past is done with and the future may never be ours. If you are not at peace with yourself and able to savour your own company, then all the activity in the world cannot help you.

Peace is not to be found in travel to exotic lands or in going to the poshest clubs. Even something as simple as sitting beside your window looking out at the rain can be peaceful or watching your baby sleep or realizing how each petal of a flower is a work of art or looking at the shapes the clouds make in the blue sky... So to adapt a popular tagline, 'doing nothing IS possible'. I just hope one day I can achieve this. Best of luck to me and to you! :)

Season of mists and mellow fruitfullness

Back.
From the streets of London, from the chaos of Kolkata during the Pujos. Had a great time. Rushed about from one gathering to another ignoring jetlag and exhaustion, fueled by adrenaline and mouthwatering lunches and dinners. The chance to catch up with good friends after what seemed like ages, the thrill of an entire city partying till the late hours, so much to do and so little time. How could I afford to miss out on all the craziness when I knew this would only last for 4 days? The recovery started from Dashami and carried on through the week. Lakshmi Puja led to an extended weekend and a chance for more relaxation. I love this season. Durga Puja flags off a fresh period full of festivals and holidays. It coincides with that time of the year when the evenings get longer, smokier somehow, smelling of fragrant flowers, a slow intoxication that culminates in a rapturous farewell to the year.

As for my trip to London, was more busy this time than I had expected. Glad that I managed to do some sightseeing. Went to Oxford - that land of dreaming spires, where every true-blue English Honours student of Calcutta University hopes to one day visit if not study at. Beautiful town with every turn packed with history so that every street you step into waits to tell its story. Had lunch at a pub that C.S. Lewis and J.R. Tolkien used to frequent, read texts from the 16th and 17th century which outlined the efforts that the learned men of the day were making to decipher science and geography and language at the Bodleian library, went to Alice's Shop that featured as the Old Sheep Shop in the famous novel, visited Christchurch College where parts of the Harry Potter movies were filmed...so much really to take in on a cold, grey English day.

Getting slowly back to normal (read: boring) schedules. Can't believe tomorrow is Monday again. Where did the last three days vanish... Ate a lot, slept some, hoped in vain for some good movies to watch and finished reading a few novels. P.D. James' "Cover her Face" was interesting. In the vein of typical Agatha Christie style English countryside murder mysteries. Not as good as an Agatha Christie but not so bad either.

Also finished reading "The Immortals of Meluha" by Amish. It's part of the Shiva Trilogy which the author will be penning. Based on the very intriguing premise that Shiva was an ordinary man who was elevated to the status of a god by his actions. Building in a lot of religious references that are given a practical explanation. Felt extremely let down however, by the language used which is very contemporary and casual. Shiva for instance keeps saying things like "bloody hell"! One would think we were not talking about the ancient Hindu god but about the reincarnation of some Englishman?! The book has novel theories and ideas, but in a literary work, how can language be ignored. And this I read after the P.D. James where a few choice words were enough to convey every nuance with economy and subtlety, often leaving the reader to work out the meaning of a sentence.

Anyways, I've spent enough time on the computer...time to log out of cyberspace...au revoir...

A decision made and some other life lessons

Decisions are always so much easier to make when they don’t affect you directly. I had to make a difficult choice recently and after a lot of careful thought I went with what my heart said – something I think I knew from the beginning. Different people gave different advice – some vehemently, some gently. But if there’s one thing I have learnt in life, it is this – always listen to others but eventually do what you feel is right.

Nobody and I mean nobody, not your closest friend or your family, can take your place in life. What this means is that they can never completely feel your happiness, your pain, your confusion, your angst as much as you do. They cannot live for you. They will always be one step removed from the real thing – you. The sooner one realizes this, the easier it becomes to stop relying on others. However much you take opinions about how to run the race, eventually you will be the one running it. That is not to say that the advice doesn’t help or guidance or sympathy or some kind of empathy doesn’t help. Of course it helps. It goes some way in fine-tuning the ideas that are already present in your head. It gives you solace. It shows you a different way of looking at things sometimes.

But the thing to remember is – your life is yours only. You will have to fight your own battles. You should be solely responsible for whatever decisions you make. And there is comfort to be drawn from that. And courage in owning up to it.

Another thing I realized is how you have to figure out what works for you. In other words, one man’s meat may be another man’s poison. What sounds like a great opportunity to one person need not seem that way to another. It is all a question of priorities. And it is important to be sure of one’s priorities in life. There are so many things we compromise upon in life. Too often, it is too easy to get drawn into something that goes against what you once believed in. It is essential to be aware of the non-negotiables. To realize that no matter what, this is something you are not going to give up on. It is important to take a stance and stick to it because otherwise you will fall for anything and everything the world throws at you.

It is important to realize that you don’t need to, and more importantly, can’t, please everybody all the time. It is impossible. This is one of those realizations that are guaranteed to bring about a lot of satisfaction in the long run. It is hard to avoid the temptation to be a crowd-pleaser. And it is also not necessary that you have to rebel against everything. Just learn to live with the fact that everyone may not like you. And that’s cool because you don’t like everyone either.

So… a lot of the heavy stuff today but that’s another side to me.

Nothing in particular

Okay, this is going to be a rambling post about nothing in particular.

I am currently reading "Rage" by Jonathan Kellerman. Interesting in parts. Just happy to find some time to read again. Also reading short stories by Stephen King written under his pseudonym, Richard Bachman. And about to begin on the third book of the Millenium trilogy by Steig Larsson. In the middle of Sherlock Holmes' "A Study in Scarlet" too.

When I was younger, I had this rule of reading one book at a time so as not to dilute its essence. Now I find that I rarely get much time to read and when I do, I'd rather go with the type of story that fits my mood at that point in time. I mean, if I'm reading at 11.30 in the night after a gruelling day at work, I cannot bear to read anything too heavy. I'll probably miss the nuances or the beautiful use of language and fall asleep after the first paragraph. What I read then is a fast paced bit of fiction - just a story nothing more, nothing less. Over a lazy Sunday afternoon (or a day like today, when a bandh disrupts any chance of going out), I read books that require more attention. Just having all these books to read makes me happy. Never mind that I read them in bits and pieces and infrequently.

The last movie I watched in the theatre was "Lafangey Parindey" Read my review here. I have been wanting to watch "Byomkesh Bakshi" - a Bengali movie based on the detective novels of Saradindu Bandhyopadhyay. While I enjoyed the Doordarshan serial starring Rajit Kapoor, my main motivation for wanting to watch this is because it stars a friend.
I also want to watch "Dabangg" - promises to be a seeti-bajao type laughathon. A movie to be watched with a group of close friends ready to laugh at the stupidest gags and corniest lines of Inspector Chulbul Pandey (yes, that's Salman Khan for you). And with a song like 'Main Zandu balm hui, darrling tere liye!' can anybody even doubt its eccentric humour! also directed by Anurag Kashyap's brother, so there's a recommendation right there.

A close friend is in town and we will be catching up soon for lunch. I have been missing a Peter Cat sizzler for some time now. *Dreamy grin* Gorged on pizza again over the weekend. Sometimes I think my life can be divided into Before-Domino's and After-Domino's phases. More festivities lined up in the coming days means more good food. Donno when I am going to diet! Eid is this weekend - brings to mind all the delicacies that our Muslim neighbours would share during Ramazan when we lived in Park Circus. Fresh fruits, spicy Chana, keema puffs, potato and onion pakoras, sewai...yumm!

On a different note, read in the papers today that some politician justified today's bandh saying that "people face problems for 364 days in a year, so what's 1 more day? That too when its for a good cause!" There are so many things wrong with that statement that I'll get too agitated before I can articulate anything properly. By the way, the "cause" is price rise, Centre's policy of divestment, petrol price hike and more...

Another candle on the cake

A few days back I crossed another milestone in this confusing journey we call life...it was my birthday you see! :)

I have to confess: I totally look forward to my birthday - its like my own personal cue to happiness. I'm not quite sure why this is. I suppose its a residue of childhood that I still carry with me. All I know is that when I'm counting all the holidays from January to December to see when I can catch a break, my birthday is what keeps me going through June. On our birthdays each one of us can feel special. We may be part of a group of students or teachers, Geminians or Librans, North Indians or South Indians...and still feel unique.


This year I was thinking about how the way I spend my birthdays has changed over the years. Now that I'm a grown-up and all, you see. When I was a kid, it was about children's parties. Lots of chocolates, candies, munchies. The "khoi-bag" which when torn would spill out a host of goodies, the birthday bumps, the games which involved all that running around, exhausting but ultimately satisfying. And who can forget the gifts! I was happiest when someone gifted me a book. But I was also mesmerised by a new box of pastel colours or sketch pens. I loved the board games that I got and the ping-pong bats and the yo-yo. What I did not like was when people gifted me money - I thought it was such a waste!



Of course as I grew older, I began to appreciate gifts of cash more than kind since it meant I could get myself whatever i wanted. I really wished people would refrain from gifting me clothes. I was developing a sense of how I wanted to dress and the ideas of well-intentioned but sadly clueless relatives did not help. :(

When I was in college, birthdays meant giving a treat to friends. So we would all bunk classes and go in a huge group to some joint having decent food and modest prices. I fondly remember some such trips during my B-school days where almost half the class would make their way down in a chattering group to a restaurant nearby and gorge on biryani or butter nan. Considering how many birthdays there were in a group of 20-25 people, we often suspected that our combined appetite single-handedly kept the restaurant running!

Even once I started working, I was lucky to have a group of friends who ensured that this day felt special even at the workplace. We would go out for lunch and exchange gifts. On the weekends when everyone was more likely to be free, I would make more elaborate plans to meet and treat various groups of friends from school, college and work.


As we grow older and our lives change, a lot of friends and relatives have moved out of my city. Birthdays become a great way to catch up with almost all of them in a single day! I look on this as one of the great perks of birthdays. With the advent of mobile phones, receiving calls at midnight has also become that much easier. This year also friends and relatives called up at the stroke of 12. It is a different matter that I had fallen asleep, thus causing several parties various degrees of aggravation ("How dare you fall asleep when I stayed up waiting to call you!").


Since I spend so much time out of home anyways, this year I spent a quiet day with family at home and celebrated by cutting a cake (chocolate of course). This cake cutting ceremony is a tradition that my family religiously adheres to and even if I feel silly sometimes, no birthday feels complete withou it. We had an amazing feast at home itself and I got chocolates, perfumes, clothes and... gift vouchers for Oxford bookstore(big hug to my sis)! When I returned to work, I received a card signed by my colleagues and cut a couple of cakes (yes chocolate again) as is the practice. Later I met some friends for a lunch date and had a great time drooling over some awesome Italian fare (food I mean).

As I grow older, I have increasingly had people ask me about my future plans. They sometimes hint and sometimes state that time running out and I should hurry into doing the things I'm "supposed" to do. They try to suggest that my birthday is now more a signal that the clock is ticking than any occasion to celebrate. But age is just a question of mind over matter, as far as I'm concerned...if you don't Mind it doesn't Matter!

I realize that things are changing with every passing year and sometimes I wonder how I became 29 so fast. I sure don't feel 29! But the wistfulness soon passes. I have too much fun childishly looking forward to birthdays to be too bogged down by the numbers. I guess what I'm trying to say is, any excuse for celebration that we get in life should be grabbed with both hands. After all, that's what when you truly celebrate Life! :)



Photos courtesy: Google Images

The Remains of the Day

Recently one of our family friends passed away. She was a kind-hearted and generous lady of around 70, who lived an active life. She had lived with her doting husband in Kolkata, working for an NGO that helped underprivileged children. Their only daughter studied, married and eventually settled in the US. This lady had gone to visit her daughter this summer and passed away most unexpectedly of a cardiac arrest. She did not have a history of heart disease. Her husband is inconsolable. He is a UP Hindu and she was a Mangalorean Christian. They were part of the swish set of 60’s Calcutta – he a squash playing, party loving dashing young man, she a beautiful, dainty young woman with an independent spirit. They met at a party and hit it off.

Their love and beautiful sense of companionship could be seen in the way they spoke about each other. Now, this uncle says, he doesn’t know how to stay alone in his big house. Everywhere he turns, everything he sees reminds him of her. He speaks of her beautiful saris which are hanging in the cupboard, her neat little kitchen where she would experiment with different cuisines, her favourite couch on which they would sit down to watch the latest DVD’s their daughter sent… At 75, his love hasn’t dimmed.

Their daughter is here now, to share this hard time with her father. But what will he do once she is gone, I wonder. He refuses to settle down in the US at this late stage of his life and she has her life waiting for her back in Chicago. I watch as he dabs his eyes with his handerkerchief and wipes away some memories. In a voice that is cultured and unfailingly polite, he thanks us for going to visit him. I put my arms around him and give him a hug. I wish I could do something more to ease his pain but I know that in life, as in death, we are alone.

Time vs. Money

During my college years and especially during my post graduation days, I nurtured a fond dream. It was called “When I start earning my own money”. It involved vivid and vibrant schemes for self-indulgence and self-improvement. I dreamed of a high-powered lifestyle where I played squash in the mornings and went swimming in the evenings. I also learned a foreign language, joined a photography class with my new digital SLR and learned to play the guitar and/or piano. These dreams were founded on a single glorious truth – I would be earning enough money to indulge myself.

Don’t get me wrong – it’s not that I couldn’t pursue all these activities as a student. I just didn’t want my parents to pick up the tab for my essentially whimsical dreams. I wanted the liberty of doing something because it pleased me and giving it up when it didn’t. I also felt it would be a lot more fulfilling to pick up a new skill on my own steam.

But alas! Maybe I was naïve, maybe plain clueless, but I never realized the demands my job would make on my time. On an average I spend around 11 hours at work, 5 days a week. Most times I work on Saturdays too even though “technically” it’s a holiday in my organization. It’s the same story with friends who work in other private sector firms. The mantra for success is ‘perform or perish’. Work or my office now forms an overwhelming part of my life and occupies an uncomfortably large part of my thoughts. On weekdays, when I return home, I am too exhausted to even contemplate a hobby. On the weekends, I de-stress by doing nothing more taxing than chatting with family, watching movies, eating out or shopping.

I still dream of joining up for some non-work related activity but I never seem to have the time to find out the details and in case I do, I find the hours incompatible with my work life. I have to admit, I have also lost a bit of ‘ye olde enthusiasm’. I could probably squeeze in some class on a Sunday but after all the time I put in at work, whatever little I get to myself is sacrosanct – meant only for some good ole R&R (rest and relaxation people, not rock and roll). “Me” time is strictly rationed.

So after five years of being a salaried professional, I am yet to bring down the house by strumming a Spanish guitar or spout melodic French to awed listeners. It is only now that I feel most keenly just how much free time I used to have as a student. How much freedom I had (and to think I used to chafe at parental restrictions!). Such little responsibility. Sigh!

The irony has not escaped me – When you have time, you don’t have money and when you have money you don’t have time.

But I don’t give up easily. And our dreams however small or big, are our spurs. Someday I will be a sporty, French speaking, guitar playing, expert photographer...someday. And did I mention Bhartanatyam dancing?

Food, glorious food!

I just adore cookery shows on TV.

There’s something enchanting about seeing the everyday ingredients transformed into tempting creations with minimal hassle and with more neatness than I believed humanly possible. I love seeing the neat little bowls of spices and condiments, the shining pots and pans, the variety of spoons, knives and spatulas, the bright greens and yellows of the vegetables, expertly julienned or diced, the pristine looking filet of fish, the tender piece of juicy steak, the glazing with honey, the sizzle of butter, the batter of eggs and flour, the melting chocolate, the frosted icing…

All this might make you believe that I love cooking and you couldn’t be more wrong. Some people might find cooking relaxing but I find watching cookery shows with their aesthetic, non-messy approach immensely therapeutic. I take comfort from what the great French cook, Julia Child (on whom the movie Julie & Julia was based) said, “I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then I just ate.” So there’s still hope for me…

Anyways, my favourite celebrity chef is Nigella Lawson. She hosts ‘Nigella Feasts’ and ‘Nigella Bites’. Her cooking style is relaxed and almost flirtatious. A few male friends have even been known to say that they find Nigella's cooking almost sensual. Here’s what Rahul Khanna had to say - "Nigella Lawson's cooking show is mouthwatering. And the food looks delicious too!" :) Well anyways, for me the most important criterion is that the dishes she rustles up look immensely edible. Also, she doesn't skimp in terms of portions or ingredients. Whether it is rich chocolate cake or honey glazed chicken roast, you know you're getting the real thing, diets be damned!


Kylie Kwong is an Australian-Chinese chef famous for her Oriental cuisine. She travels the South-East Asian countries speaking to the locals and cooking up the delicacies the region offers. I am sorry to say that the dishes she makes, fail to make my mouth water. Don’t take me wrong – I like my ‘Chinese’ cuisine as much as the other person. But I’m not into exotic foods overmuch. My dissatisfaction with Kylie’s show could thus have something to do with the episode where she boiled small octopuses. I guess I'm not much of an octopus person.

The men are not to be left behind of course. Jamie Oliver is the cute Brit guy on the cooking show scene. He is also known as The Naked Chef – thankfully not for his sartorial preferences but because of the unprocessed nature of the dishes he makes. His show focuses on using organic and fresh produce, from his own garden sometimes, as ingredients. The dishes look healthy and sumptuous at the same time. He tends to be a little rough and ready in terms of style.

Anthony Bourdain is a famous American chef who hosts ‘No Reservations’ – a travel cum food show. He travels to different places round the globe and samples all the food that it offers. He has the distinction of having eaten fermented shark, warthog rectum and uncooked seal eyeball! Okay, sorry for the gross-out but it’s true. On the other hand he also roams the valleys of Tuscany sampling choice Italian dishes. And the streets of Mumbai eating “bheja fry” or fried goat brains…okay, seriously I cannot get over what all this man has consumed and lived to tell the tale!

On a more comfortable and homely note, Rachel Allen, an Irish celebrity chef, has a show called ‘Bake!’ where she…err…bakes. Since I am not an “I-hate-carbs” person, the delicious and warm looking goodies she makes are right up my street. Cakes, breads, biscuits – it’s a wonderful fairytale world in Rachel’s kitchen. Her focus is on making baking seem like a relatively simple process which you don’t need to be a celebrity chef to master. On her show, she also teaches groups of people how to bake different items and makes it seem like the easiest thing.

While we are at it, let us not forget Madhur Jaffrey – the grand dame of Indian cooking shows. This multi-faceted personality is “an actress who can also cook.” Besides being a noted actress credited with introducing Ismail Merchant to James Ivory, Jaffrey is the noted author of cookbooks of Indian, Asian, and world vegetarian cuisines, many of which have become bestsellers. She is credited with introducing the Western world to Indian food. I caught a few of her shows on Travel & Living and enjoyed watching her cook some spicy South Indian fish curry. She feels like a grandmom sharing a personal recipe for a favourite dish.


Kunal Vijayekar is another new ‘Foodie’ on the block (and boy, doesn't he look the part!). He is also a well known character artiste but I feel he fills up the shoes of a gourmet best. He tends to leave the cooking to experts and instead puts himself in the shoes of the audience. Except of course that he gets to sample the dishes that the chefs conjure up.

Though I have seen several other such programmes some from the good ol' Doordarshan days, these are the few people who I could name off the top of my mind. Those who made their food speak to me. There are many other such shows and many other dishes to be tasted…
So till then I will leave you with this tantalising visual and just say, bon appétit!

What say?

"If God made everything, then God must live in China!"

- Dennis the Menace